The world seemed perfect, Haven for Home was wonderful, my new job was not only on point… But my boss, Mrs. Joyce Walker was like the San Antonio Oprah. Mrs. Walker was driven, strong, and full of grace. I could only imagine where we would be headed together.
Unfortunately, the last month I was employed there was physically a nightmare. I had lost 25 pounds, my face had no color, and I could barely walk or keep my body up and working.
Mrs. Walker told me I needed to take care of myself and not return until I was healthy again. They waited a few weeks, but they couldn’t wait for ever and I don’t blame them. 😩
As I struggled with my health I started concentrating on taking care of me and my faith. I was about to venture on a few months of team building for my faith with a team of awesome women at St. Matthews.
A few weeks after I began I spoke to the priest at Oblate Grotto, which wasn’t planned.
He told me God had a plan for me, and I needed to follow. He told me not to worry about my job as I cried, God would give me a job when it was time. He told me this job would take care of me and all my family needs, I was worried and was showing very little faith. He advised me to let go of all the fear, give it to God and I would know when the time was right to ask God. I knew when I asked God to help me find a job he would replace it with a job making more money, security, happiness, and opportunity than ever before; just as he did every step of the way in my life so far. Each week as I focused on the retreat my fears were diminished. The day of the actual retreat I had to borrow money from my grandma to purchase a few necessities, I had to secure a plan to pay back the money team members also have to pay for retreat funds. The day of the retreat I knew that it was all in Gods plan and he would repay me for doing his work with the security of a job, because it was a need and not just a want.
The Lord really did seem to take care of things so far, along with Gustavo’s hard work 😊. Things started to get hard after Christmas it seemed. I was healthy, ready to work, but it seemed my resume was being ignored to every place it was sent to. I began to feel angry and frustrated. I felt forsaken, yet I hadn’t asked for the Lord’s intervention. It is so easy to assume the “Lord already knows.” Did I forget about freewill? Did I forget we are not Gods robots. I humbly asked my Lord to please intervene. I asked the Lord to take the wheel for a minute while I emotionally fell apart. The same night during a Facebook conversation with a good friend asking about the sadness in my eyes, I admitted something I hadn’t for a while in a comment… I was out of work. I wanted to erase it; I felt wonder woman was being exposed, I was a fake I hadn’t kicked butt in months. Fighting kidney stones … Where is the difference in my community these days?
One thing I am not always is wonder woman, but one thing I am always, is real ! Struggles and all…
Within a few hours I was contacted by a sister of faith and even more unbelievable…she was a
retreatant ! It was God way telling me, all you had to do was have faith, talk to me from the heart and as a reminder of your commitment to me, I will have your Sister in Christ Lisa bring you what you need.
I was scheduled to meet Principal, see campus, and have an opportunity to share who I am the following day. I woke up with just enough gas to make it to the interview
and back; I felt sick with anxiety. I knew I needed to feel his presence so I wouldn’t blow this interview. I turned on KLOVE, low and behold…. My theme song was on…
I hadn’t heard it in months, tears began to feel my eyes, and my perfect makeup was done. I started to feel the sadness drain, the fear disintegrate, I felt the power again, the Power that only “The One” can bring, the excitement, the hope, what was I holding onto when I don’t have to.