Dating, Friendship, Prostitute, Police, who can we trust …

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Afternoon dates~ ūüíüūüíĚ

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Gus doesn’t mind when I have my afternoon dates with my “other love“…

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Afternoon Love

Sitting here staring at the sweet innocence in his gaze, the softness and understanding in his gesture. ¬†Intrigued with his magnificence, wanting and yearning to know about more and more about all the legends of the “ONE“… the one, we call/ed Jesus Christ, the only KING.

Check In~

I have been here at this location of our date, before; many times since I was five years old;

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1700 Clower St, San Antonio, Texas 78201, sitting in the small chapel of adoration at St.Mary Magdalene. ¬†St. Mary Magdalene was a very interesting woman by the way…¬†Click here to read about Mary Magdalene¬†makes me realize Jesus understanding to others that have been here needing his love, understanding, assistance; just like me… I may have done sin after sin; I may have done the unspeakable; who hasn’t? ¬†When he looks at me; he doesn’t see a mistake; he doesn’t see my wrongs; he sees me his worthy one… ‚̧

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It seems life is harder for ME; doesn’t seem like that for you? ¬†Always getting the bad luck; the short end of the stick. ¬†All great people have a dream; and I can tell you with certainty they all felt similar numerous times in their life; but the difference between some and all; is some NEVER give up; and they keep picking themself up again and again; and then it seems they depart…. ¬†#Truth

It is by those who we have allowed in, that hurt us the most; they know exactly how; and yet they still hurt us… the one’s we allow it set us up; fail us and even use us for their own personal gain.

Life isn’t fair; and we learn that people don’t play fair.

One of the hardest things in life; is learning about trust; learning how to trust another after being hurt and betrayed time and time again. ¬†Learning how to trust people who don’t deserve our trust; and learning there are some who we learn are called LIARS, who don’t deserve our trust. ¬†We often times fight to learn to trust; and after tough battles we actually learn that yes, we can trust; and sometimes when we do; we learn that people we love make mistakes and lose our trust; and they may never get it again; and the cycle is never-ending.

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As I sit here in the chapel; I think about the amazing history of Mary Magdalene a known prostitute.  Many of us would not trust the judgement of someone who would live such a lifestyle; yet the woman who many would place as the lowest of the low; was one of the most loyal souls to Jesus Christ.  #LOYALTY Jesus never looked at Mary Magdalene as if she was beneath him; she experienced Jesus love; became loyal to him; followed him to the end; to the last moments of his life; during the crucifixion; and even afterward in the  tomb.

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Loyalty isn’t easy; and I am not just talking about in monogamous relationships; I am talking about loyalty in basic everyday relationships like FRIENDSHIPS. ¬†Are you the type of friend who stays loyal to your friend; even if you are angry you won’t throw them under the bus. ¬†Even if you don’t understand their reasoning; you stand by to offer support. ¬†Do you judge and talk about them when they aren’t around; if so; why; what does it do for you? ¬†Anyone can spit like a llama, claw like a lion, and allow their words to spew with little thought; and there is a lot in this world to be angry about; but when we make the decision to blame instead of understand that should be the first sign it is time to re-evaluate.

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I really think each of us needs to ignore that “whiny” person~ that screams¬†“me, me, me…” more and reach out to all those places we have been to find our own understanding within our own soul. Things maybe going very hard for me; and while it is so, ¬†I know every one has their own story; they have their own struggles. ¬†I am not a scorekeeper who wants to compare “battle scars”; but when one¬†feels that you have to; ¬†there are two reasons I can be sure of.

One is obviously there has been a disconnection somewhere along the friendship which is normal and common with today’s busy life. ¬†We can’t always be there for every person who means the world to us; we have so many obligations and responsibilities. ¬† If the person is loyal you will both work on the relationship by remembering to stay in touch by¬†letting them know what is going on when able; so they can give you personal space and best of all support as a friend should. We don’t have “magicians or people” who can fix things we have to fix ourselves; I don’t need anyone to fix anything for me; I just need understanding, love, support; and loyalty. ¬†If you can’t give that it is time to go. ¬†YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE!

Two your friendship is shallow with little understanding and it is time to stop carrying another heavy weight you don’t need. ¬†People grow, stay stagnant, and some fall the loyalty to walk away for your own personal peace is very important; at times people forget if it doesn’t matter to another you can’t make it.

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It is a sad thing to realize that you and someone who you once understood; and understood you; grow in different directions; because there will always be those sweet memories you hold on to. ¬†You also; want that person in your life but with different experiences in life; it is easy to grow in a completely different direction. ¬†The more life that passes us by; the more hardships we face; the more we become a person that never was before; a person with either wisdom that has been enlighted or a person with hurt who becomes bitter. ¬†Some people are not ready to come with us on our latest journey; some people don’t have what it takes; and that is ok…

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Friends have “fall- outs”; they don’t agree on things; they get angry about decisions their friends make; feel frustrated when their advice is ignored; hurt when they feel they have been left out; sad when they are feeling misunderstood; tired of trying and getting hurt again and again by people… THAT IS WHAT RELATIONSHIPS are ABOUT ! ¬†It is ok; you keep growing together ALWAYS~ if the relationship¬†is worth it!

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Just like one of my favorite lyrics states~ “It’s gonna take more than a bullet in the heart to take me out…” ¬†the same goes true with trust; it is gonna take more than LIARS to take me out; taking my trust away is just that! I will take the liar out before I will allow my trust to get taken. ¬†I know one thing when you are “true” to yourself; it is easier to know others can be true as well.

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Who or what do you trust in?

God is conceived of as the Supreme Being and principal object of faith. The concept of God as described by most theologians includes the attributes of omniscience (infinite knowledge), omnipotence (unlimited power), omnipresence (present everywhere), divine simplicity, and as having an eternal and necessary existence. Many theologians also describe God as being omnibenevolent (perfectly good) and all loving.

The truth is God has a different meaning to each of us. Some people believe in a God, many gods, and some people believe they are a god. I do however believe that trust in another can be a great thing, and many of us have learned we can trust in no-one, and will always keep us divided. If someone believes in trust; they can be trusted; they wouldn’t understand it unless they knew it. ¬†If someone believes in trust; trust in God; and that allows them to their job protecting our community; how can we deny them that… it is so basic~ we aren’t naming their God; we are simply saying we believe….in ~

I have been helped by the police numerous times, one in particular is when I was 18 years old, kidnapped from a gas station, beaten, and raped and I will tell you something, I didn’t care what was written on their car, uniform, or tatted on their body. ¬†I needed to believe and trust in another human being, when all fear had been fueled in me, and I was drained of my hope in the human race. Have you ever been so drained, beaten… you are afraid you will NEVER be restored! You look back and just realize how many wasted YEARS you allowed the devil to rule. ¬†

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We can’t sit here and look at our wounds; we can’t sit at all and what~ what for, to let more time be taken away, more time to feel yourself down. ¬†We have got to get up and do; life our own self up; we can’t allow for us to be put down and stay there; and if we fall we fight with all our might to get, ¬†get¬†the hell up; GET UP!

Eric Wright walked through the WHITE house without a business suit; COMPTON; had Jheri Curl dripping on Ronald Regan shoes… #stayingTrue2You

 

We have to keep pushing; even if we had it hard from the beginning; the battles get bigger the bigger we get; but some of us were just made to be HUGE; live big because no matter what, we will! WE take every set back, learn from it; and blow up bigger and badder than ever; but with more understanding and wisdom…. we need the KING on our side; the most powerful one; with the KING the Almighty on my side; I will win; maybe not now, today but definitely.

One comment

  1. […] is a little article about women, friendship; and a few lesson learned along the way ūüėČ in just the past few […]

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